Caregivers Should Take Aim At Goals, Care For Self
This article was published on Monday, January 29, 2007
By Fink Holloway
Special to The Morning News
Website:
http://www.nwaonline.net/articles/2007/02/09/your_family/013007yfschmieding.txtIt is basketball season and we know that the players who excel spend hours shooting at the goal to improve their game. Since your work as a caregiver is so much more important than basketball, you also need to practice. Practice to reach your caregiver goals. Some days your "ball" will fall short of your goal, but keep on trying.
Caregiver Goals1. Take care of yourself.
Eat healthy foods. Take a nap. Get away. Take time for a walk or trip to the mall for you own pleasure. These trips not only provide physical exercise, but bring fresh air to your spirit.
Too many caregivers do not realize the importance of taking care of themselves. They work without sleep, skip meals, and eliminate all of their former interests to care for someone they love. That isn't good. Some people who tried to be on call 24 hours a day 7 days a week have died trying to provide care for their loved one. Don't kill yourself trying to do more than one person can possibly do.
When my father was terminally ill, there were times when my mother slept in the bedroom next door to my father so that she would not have constant interruptions throughout the night. She knew the child who was working the night shift would call for her if she was needed, and she didn't need to be awakened every time Dad needed a drink. She was exhausted and needed some sleep. It was good for her to take care of herself so that in the morning she had more energy to give to Dad.
2. Get some help. It is not just "OK" to ask your children or your neighbors to help you with meals or help with the care of your loved one; it is a very wise thing to do.
When someone offers to help, by all means accept it. One way to let them know what they can do is to make a list of the things you are doing. Then when someone offers to help show them the list and let them choose the things they could do. Include things like: buy the groceries, prepare meals, do laundry, clean the house, drive to the doctor's office, pick up prescriptions, and stay with your loved one so you can get out. Accepting help is not a sign of weakness. The wisest and wealthiest businessmen recruit other people to assist them. So don't wait until your loved one qualifies for Hospice to seek Respite care.
Individuals who have a stroke or Alzheimer's disease may need care for several years. Their caregivers need a break too. Many community and church groups have volunteers who give help. If you do not know anyone who can assist you, contact The Schmieding Center for Senior Education. The Schmieding Center has a Resource List with information on volunteer organizations and adult day care centers. The Schmieding Center also has a list of home caregivers who can be hired. Call 479-751-3043 and ask for the Caregiver Directory. It lists names and phone numbers of individuals who are trained to give care in the home. The cost of hiring a trained caregiver to come in the home runs from $8 to $12 per hour.
3. Look for assistive devices.If the condition that caused you to become a caregiver is new to you, there is a very good chance that you do not know about helpful gadgets and medical equipment that are available. Some of the bigger items such as hospital beds and mechanical lifts can be rented. Many other tools that make life easier can be purchased. Stop by a medical supply store or drug store and ask the clerk if he knows of products that are helpful for someone who has the condition with which you are dealing. There are items that promote safety, save time, and protect the back of the caregiver. Some devices are designed to restore independence to individuals. These make an excellent investment and may be covered by Medicare and/or private insurance. Look in the yellow pages under Medical Equipment and Supplies for a listing of the stores in your area.
4. Smile.When a person is tired or overwhelmed, it is easy to become grumpy and frown. So practice smiling. Sometime today, look in the eyes of your loved one and give them a warm smile. You will both feel better. Smile at the person you are caring for AND smile at yourself. Whether you look in a literal mirror or just look in your soul, smile at yourself and give yourself some pats on the back. Coaches love it when players smack each other on the back or give high fives. Athletes who are in the prime of their life need to hear: "Good job!" Caregivers need encouragement too. So smile at yourself, and encourage yourself. You will find your job is easier when you smile while you work. Don't forget to smile at the physicians and nurses you meet. That little expression of warmth is bound to be a blessing anywhere you go.
5. Be Gentle.
Many people recognize the letters TLC -- Tender Loving Care. As a caregiver, make every effort to be gentle and kind. The person you care for is more likely to cooperate and be pleasant when you give the care in a way that shows tenderness and respect. If a person feels threatened or abused by rough treatment, he is going to resist, and make your job harder. Yanking the sheets or clothing can actually tear the skin, creating additional pain for your loved one and extra work for you. Your personal satisfaction as a caregiver will be greater when you know you have treated others the way you would like to be treated.
Basketball teams would never have a winning season if each player practiced alone and merely worked to sharpen his skills as an individual. Coaches know the importance of team work, and they work hard building the team spirit. Caregiving is also intended to be a "team sport." Caregivers who try to beat the odds alone could put their loved one at risk. If exhaustion and fatigue set in, performance could decline. So make a conscious effort to be a team player. Seeking advice and support from others who are traveling down the same road is bound to be of great benefit and will help you in reaching your goals.
The Schmieding Center has two support groups for caregivers: Family Centered Caregiving (which meets on the third Monday of each month), and Family Caregivers of Persons with Dementia (which meets the second Tuesday and fourth Wednesday of each month). Contact Carolyn Wheeler at 751-3043 for more information. There are others in your community and family who can play a key role in your caregiving and help give your loved one the very best care possible.
Fink Holloway is an administrative assistant for
The Schmieding Center for Senior Health And Education.
Schmieding CenterFor Senior HealthAnd Education
(800) 866-8991
Springdale
2422 N. Thompson
751-3043
Bella Vista
1801 Forest Hills Blvd.
876-2335
